Shades of November

My 11th month pretty much has been a journey of 

I-don't-want-to-feel-this-way-again. 

It was draggy. It was difficult. It was lonely.

My few last posts quite painted a picture of what I was going through. But thanks at last... it's the 30th! Today is November's last day! Yay! I don't actually know for sure if November in itself has something to do with it as I was quite like this too, last year. I'm just thinking --- either what I've felt was: 

a given, understandable, destined feeling,

or a choice.

Or maybe both (?).

On the lighter side, now that I am back on the groove, pretty much back to my normal self, I plotted my 11th month in matches and in shades.

By God's grace I now rise from a pitch black - gray - blue - feeling, to a greener, full of hope spirit. I am a runner. I am winner. I am a victor. 

I believe we are called to rise above our situations. Beauty for ashes.

To November next year, may I make a request? Please be kind to me because 

I don't want to feel this way again. 

---

Hebrews 12:1-2

New International Version (NIV)

12 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, ² fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.

---

2 Corinthians 1:3-4

New International Version (NIV)

³ Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, ⁴ who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.

A Tune in Time

When all has been said and done and gone, off to bed she goes ---

I am really all by myself, am I not?

These were the few words of her who's braving life independently said in between sighs. As everything in life has a purpose, these timely words came:

...You think you're on your own

but you're not alone...

This is the promise HE made

HE will be with you always...

How can words come so exact? How can it come so timely? 

It came through a melody. As she is walking in her lowest, and as we give her time for a break, allow me to share this song. I hope you won't mind if I request you to listen to this, too. You maybe needing this today or maybe someday.

To the one who's dreams are falling all apart

And all you're left with is a tired and broken heart
I can tell by your eyes you think you’re on your own
but you're not alone

Have you heard of the One who can calm the raging seas
Give sight to the blind, pull the lame up to their feet?
With a love so strong He'll never let you go
No, you're not alone

You will be safe in His arms
You will be safe in His arms
The hands that hold the world are holding your heart
This is the promise He made
He will be with you always
When everything is falling apart
You will be safe in His arms

Did you know that the voice that brings the dead to life
Is the very same voice that calls you now to rise?
So hear Him now He's calling you home
You will never be alone

These are the hands that built the mountains
the hands that calm the seas
These are the arms that hold the heavens
they are holding you and me

These are hands that healed the leper
Pulled the lame up to their feet
These are the arms that were nailed to a cross
to break our chains and set us free

---

That's all I have for today. Nothing more, nothing less. I hope the song ministered to you, too.

The Day I Wore Blue

* Another overdue response to one of my previous posts. :)

Green has always been my color. But it was on the 16th of May this year I had given blue a chance, a try ~ on my friend's wedding day (her wedding deserves another post though). 

People say that you are what you wear. I think it's true. 
A lot of things are going through my head right now, but this post has nothing much to say.

I was wearing blue then outside.

I am wearing blue now inside.

I do not know the other blues I might be wearing in the future, but this I know: Whatever color we may wear, there will always be a reason to smile. 

So as for me...

I will simply smile the blues away. :)

I hope and pray you will do so, too, in case you'd be wearing some blues ~ today or some other day.

A Time to Trust

Time and time again, we've been battling with so many things. One battle comes after another. Yet, the choice is always left for us to make ~ to or not to... trust.

I am thankful to be reminded:

When is the time to trust?
Is it when all is calm,
When waves the victor's palm,
And life is one glad psalm?
Nay! but the time to trust
Is when the waves beat high,
When storm clouds fill the sky,
And pray'r is one long cry.

When is the time to trust?
Is it when friends are true?
Is it when comforts woo
In all we say and do?
Nay! but the time to trust
Is when we stand alone,
And summer birds have flown,
And every prop is gone.

When is the time to trust?
Is it some future day,
When you have tried your way,
And learned to trust and pray?
Nay! but the time to trust
Is in this moment's need,
Poor, broken, bruised reed.
Poor, troubled soul, make speed!

When is the time to trust?
Is it when hopes beat high,
When sunshine gilds the sky
With joy and ecstasy?
Nay! but the time to trust
Is when our joy has fled,
When sorrow bows the head,
And all is cold and dead.

Source: http://www.hymnal.net/hymn.php/h/651#ixzz2CeZnuuJJ

Counter Encounter

"You know something? That still small voice will never shout."

It sure does and that's the way it has always been. Day in or day out, standing or lying down, going in or out, name it ~ It will really never shout.

---

It was shortly after our field work lunch that I decided to sit still and rest for a while. Some stood, went out, did their grocery, and some did their own little, mini-personal stuff. And so there I was, sitting idly by as I work & read through my mobile phone as I pass the time away.

Look away from your phone for a while and turn your eyes on your right.

Okay, so I did. Graphing out my location, about 30-ish meters away was a woman standing by the grocery counter. Seeing just a typical scenario, I went on with my phone. 

utne.com

Stand up. Go to that woman at the counter.

Before I even responded further to that, something came up again.

And please, bring your purse with you. The woman at the counter is short of money. Pay for how much she still needs.

I needed no thunderous voice nor a holy lightning to respond. In a heartbeat, I stood up bringing what I was told to bring. I know I do not have a sumptuous amount in my purse as it's an S.O.P. on field work not to bring such, but I find no harm in obeying.

A hi, a smile, and a quick glance on her grocery cart were the first few things I did when I came to the counter. I saw food and other goodies. She's a wife. She's a homemaker. She's a mom. 

Not so long (I opt not to elaborate), the woman and the cashier exchanged non-verbal, eye communication. And I was there ~ just there.

The woman released a deep, long sigh, "I am sorry, I just did not expect this. I am short of money and..."

Tada!

No further explanation needed. I immediately did the thing for which I was sent. I took out my purse and paid for the amount she still needs. And to my surprise, the not-so-much money I had was the exact amount she needs! The woman, the cashier and I were caught by surprise in different, unuttered ways.

Can somebody just made that up? I don't think so. It was a divine encounter at the counter. 

Days after, the woman made an effort to pay. I refused. She insisted. I refused again. Then she asked,

Why?

I smiled and said, "I didn't do that out of obligation. So I am not putting back such on you. You are completely not in debt. I did that out of obedience."

The encounter was not that grand, but it was a sincere act and expression of love from Above. I know the credit is not mine, but to the One who told me to stand.

For the past years, this I learned: Never doubt or discount your ability to hear from the Lord. A thunderous voice, a holy lightning we do not need, or even a question of doubt like "Maybe it's just me". A life-fellowship with Him can bring something extraordinary from an ordinary, still and peaceful day.

Told you ~ that still small voice will never shout. :)